Eldest Granddaughter, now a lively eleven years old, stayed with us for Christmas with her mother (Eldest Daughter, or ED) and her Hub, EGD’s stepDad (and an excellent one too).
One day over a meal I let slip that when her grandfather and I were first going out together in London, we had been asked to leave a wine bar.
‘ASKED TO LEAVE A WINE BAR??’ EGD was agog – as were, I noticed, her mother and stepdad.
‘Ahem. Yes,’ I said, realising too late that I should not have started this topic.
‘WHAT FOR???’ she demanded. ‘Mum – Abuelo and Abuela were chucked out of a wine bar!!!!!’
I looked at her meaningfully. ‘For snogging.’
‘YEEERRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH’ was the reply … with ED noting that this was now the standard response to any of ‘that stuff.’
‘But what did you do?? Tell me EXACTLY. What happened ?????’
‘We got up and left.’
‘It was jolly cold outside too,’ added her grandfather. ‘But’ (incorrigibly) ‘we soon found a doorway.’
‘WHAT DID YOU NEED A DOORWAY FOR?’ EGD’s eyes were bulging and she leapt up out of her chair.
‘More snogging’, he said laconically.
YEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH …. really??? Is this TRUE?’
We assured her it was … but this was not enough. She then staged a court scene, with herself in the chair as the judge, clad in my purple dressing gown, stepdad in Hub’s academic hood as Counsel for the Defence, and her grandparents in the dock. We were, of course, found guilty … and were presented with a notice. ‘NO SNOGGING’.
I made another one. ‘SNOG ZONE’.
Then we held it up in front of our faces, and made lots of kissing noises.
(image from Keep Calm-o-Matic)