PLEASE DON’T READ THIS IF …

… you find jokes about death offensive!

This is a true story.

As you know, it has become very common to put into a loved one’s coffin some of the things that meant most to him or her in this life, or that people associate most with them. So photographs, jewellery, teddy bears, flowers – these have all become quite common.

There was once a widow, whose husband had worn a toupee. Without telling anyone, she put into the coffin two cans of the spray adhesive that her husband had used as a paste to fix his toupee.

Unfortunately, she had not read the small print on the can, which tells you not to put the canister in a hot place.

At the crematorium the coffin went into the furnace. At which point there was an explosion, which bent the furnace door…

88|

(Told to Nigel Barley (an anthropologist)by a crematorium official (‘Grave Matters’, pub by New York Holt 1997)).

Advertisements

34 thoughts on “PLEASE DON’T READ THIS IF …

  1. Oh…I laughed out loud!!!! I was at a funeral a few months back and as the coffin was being lowered we all heard a mobile ring, it was in the coffin….we nearly died!!!!xxxxx

    Like

      1. We all just stood there really spooked, his wife had put his mobile in the coffin with him just in case????? when it rang we all jumped six foot, nobody knew who was ringing it, even the priest seemed spooked!xxxxx

        Like

      2. Megacrumpetinos!!!! 8| Thank goodness that didn’t happen when I was doing a funeral … I think I might just have laughed 😳

        Like

  2. :)) How LUDICROUS!!! :)) but also how awful…. to have an explosion like that at such a time! 88| Dearie me…. I never even knew you had to glue hairpieces on but I suppose they would have to be fixed somehow….8| :))

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s